BEHIND THE SCENE MUSE
- September 11, 2019
- by Nur Imroatun Sholihat
source: pixabay.com |
Some writings effortlessly occupied special places in my heart and
“Muse” is one of them.
To tell you the truth, the whole story was inspired by a close
friend’s story. I made the storyline a bit altered from the actual one since I
didn’t want people to be able to guess who that famous writer is (and I bet
you'll be surprised if I reveal his identity. Hoho). But the plot of “being
loved by your idol but couldn’t accept his feeling since you know there’s
someone who deserves him better” is authentic. I recognized my friend’s
feelings and came up with the idea of serving it as fictional writing. She
agreed and even said that she would deliver the story to the “Ikra” in real
life. Guess what? The person behind the persona had read the story :)
While writing it, I put a lot of thoughts about both of the lead
characters--Ikra and Kyra. Because I have never been a famous writer or someone
who is being loved by someone I idolized, I have to work hard imagining myself
being both of them. What helped me to write Ikra is the fact that I myself is a
writer. I know what makes a writer happy or be interested in someone. And what
helped me to bring Kyra’s emotions to the table is k-pop fans' dedication (yes
you can laugh at me. LoL)—the passionate fans who pray and take a lot of effort
for their idol’s happiness. I ever randomly watched a clip where an idol singer
unconsciously fell asleep while playing games in a variety show. His schedule
was packed to the point of he rarely slept (and he said he just following a
schedule he barely knows beforehand given by his manager every day like a
robot. Of course, it's painful to see someone you cherish living his dream
which also ironically led him to live in such an improper way). My heart felt
warm reading many comments that, instead of the typical-fans’-words encouraging
the idol to appear in as much as events he could attend to, so they can see the
idol frequently, they said: “please take care of yourself”. And I found these
nice words:
"I want him to be in a variety show where he could have
enough sleep."
Why this fan insisted that instead of resting, the idol better
stayed inside the frame? Because she wanted her idol to getting the job and
money but still managed to live properly. Imagine, wishing happiness so
sincerely for someone who hardly knows us exist in this world (even more than
wishing it for ourselves). I know it’s quite difficult to understand this kind
of feeling especially when you've never been into something/someone avidly. It
doesn’t make sense, right? Being happy or sad as if our idols share the
emotions with us, sounds absurd, right? But believe me, that kind of feeling
does exist. May I say the feeling that inspired me to write about Kyra a.k.a
fans’ feeling is one of the uwu-est feelings in the world. (Yes I’m cheesy.
Okay.) (in case you don't know what "uwu" means, it is basically a
feeling you get of too much cuteness or an overwhelming feeling of happiness,
urbandictionary said)
And pardon me for the usage of some English words in the story (I
tried to minimalize English words already but still). It basically displayed
how messy my mind is. LoL. I need to keep the original emotions I wanted to
deliver by this writing so I kept the words in the language as what popped up
in my mind if I couldn't exactly express them in Bahasa.
Trivia facts about writing Muse:
1. I shed tears while writing every single part of Muse.
2. Around the time I was writing Muse, B.I., iKON's leader, had to
leave the group. My best friend who is a big fan of iKON with her worried and
sorrowful heart couldn't accept that decision but still hoped for him to live
well. I also got inspired to write bout Kyra's feelings by seeing that kind of
situation.
3. The ending of Part 3 was inspired by a song, “Fiction”
(orchestra version) by Beast.
4. The wedding scene, where Kyra and Ikra’s eyes met, happened in
real life. And my friend said: “I thought I was okay until our pair of eyes
met,”. (cry a river)
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