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Hello, this is me!

Nur Imroatun Sholihat

Your friend in learning IT audit Digital transformation advocate a-pat-on-your-shoulder storyteller

About me

Hello

I'mNur Imroatun Sholihat

IT Auditor and Storyteller

So I heard you are curious about IT and/or auditing. I'm your go-to buddy in this exciting journey. My typical professional life consists of performing (and studying!) IT audit and leading the reporters of the award-winning magazine, Auditoria. Armed with a Master's in Digital Transformation from UNSW Sydney, I'm currently wearing multiple hats—ambassador at IIA Indonesia's Young Leader Community, mentor at ISACA Global, Head of Public Relations at MoF-Cybersecurity Community, and trainer at IIA Indonesia. You'll also find me sharing insights on my YouTube channel, speaking at seminars, and crafting content on LinkedIn. Let's connect and dive into the world of IT and auditing together!

experience

IT Auditor

2017-present

IT governance, cybersecurity, application--my daily struggle, seriously :D

Storyteller

2005-present

Writing keeps me sane :)

Content Creator

2020-present

Creating Youtube videos and LinkedIn posts, hopefully useful

IT Officer

2011-2015

performing IT services--sometimes about people forgot to plug their cords, sometimes serious incidents :p

Blog

HOW DO YOU DEAL WITH INSECURITIES?

source: freedesignfile.com


 

Yesterday, I texted my close friend a rather serious question which was unusual in the middle of our daily chatter. Seemingly out of blue, I said, “How do you deal with insecurities?”. Actually, it sounded random but deep down I knew she knew something I’m familiar with (once again) happened to me. I put my phone down for a while, expected her to write a long piece of advice about either growing better or accepting myself the way I am. However, what I heard later made my heart frantically trembling. Coming from a place where she completely understood where my insecurities began, she answered: Regarding it, I see it from a different perspective. It’s not that you need to work harder. Instead, I saw you worked too hard on it to the point it hurts me to see you being neglected and undervalued.


As a long-time friend who closely saw me several times being taken for granted yet always do a self-blaming action, she said that I need to stop being too harsh on myself. That what I did is more than enough. That I am too invested in something until I can’t see everything around it clearly anymore. That I need to stop being emotionally attached to it when all I got is being belittled. That I need to know when to stop and walk away from something that doesn’t make me happy. 

 

That I need to love myself more to choose a place where my effort is properly cherished.

 

As if time stopped, my mind went blank. A realization hit me right in the center of my heart. I expected her to say “Be patient,” or “It’s okay,” but all I got is an understanding that all this time, I treated myself badly. Here and there, I didn’t stop when I was underappreciated. Instead, I accused myself that I showed poor performance, didn’t deserved better, or hadn’t worked hard enough. From time to time, I am left behind feeling insecure about myself: maybe I am not good enough, maybe I am not perceived as someone capable, maybe I need to work harder so my effort could be recognized, maybe I am just an insignificant supporting role, maybe I am just being too demanding about respectfulness, and so on.

 

“It’s like when someone cheats on us then we blame ourselves and insist that something must be wrong with us. Even though it’s definitely the other party’s mistake, we keep blaming ourselves that we must be greatly lacking in something that someone cheats on us,” She added an analogy to this particular case. 

 

It’s true that I always blame myself when something goes off even after I’ve put all my effort and mind into it. I never realized that it’s not that I haven’t worked hard enough so people couldn’t appreciate me. It’s just easy-peasy to get me to work on something so people think there is not much going behind the work. It’s just the work done by me seems unimportant and uncomplicated so it naturally is taken for granted. It’s just I always earnestly do something as if I just automatically work so people think there is no need to be thankful for it. It’s just I am seen as someone who doesn’t demand anything so they would provide me nothing, even just an appreciation.

 

When we feel insecure, most of the time, it’s not that we are substantially deficient. Almost all insecurities come from us who couldn’t love ourselves generously. Often they come from our poor understanding of our value and life itself. That in life, nobody has everything to feel perfectly secure so why don’t we embrace our weaknesses and flaws. That in life, some people and things simply aren’t for you, so why don’t you move away?

 

Simply said, how do you deal with insecurities? Love yourself more, dear. Love yourself more. 


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P.S.:

1. First thing first, to avoid any misunderstanding, it's not about my office's teammates. You all know how much I love and adore my teammates. Besides, I don't feel like writing anything that is not favorable regarding my office because generally I love it and I am not that kind of person too.

2. One day, my friend and I ever discussed how emotionally invested we are in people and things we love. Sometimes it hurts us to see what we get in return *sobs

3. While I usually kept my emotions behind closed doors, I realized to achieve this blog's objective to provide consolation for me and hopefully for the readers too, I need to be honest about my feelings first and don't mind being exposed as a vulnerable human being. The truth is, I don't mind being seen as a vulnerable weakling. This is why my recent posts contain raw emotions :)

4. Today, I can finally say that I am no longer so emotionally attached to the particular things that were so dear to my heart. I feel better :)


NANTI ADA REZEKINYA

source: thewarsan.com

Manusia tidak akan pernah sepenuhnya memahami konsep rezeki. Sebagiannya adalah hal yang terjelaskan sedangkan sebagian lainnya adalah misteri. Dalam cara bekerja takdir yang misterius itu, percaya saja bahwa nanti akan ada rezeki untuk mimpi-mimpimu.

 

Beberapa hari yang lalu, seorang sahabat bercerita bahwa dia ingin sekali mendapatkan sertifikasi CIA. Bagi sebagian besar orang di dunia audit internal, memiliki gelar Certified Internal Auditor (CIA) memang adalah harapan yang disimpan dalam hati untuk suatu saat diperjuangkan. Tidak terhitung berapa kali orang-orang menyapa saya di LinkedIn maupun blog untuk menceritakan impian ini (dan saya tersenyum turut mendoakan). 


“Tapi ujiannya aja mahal banget. Uangnya dari mana ya,” ujarnya lirih di seberang telepon.

 

Videos

Jakarta, Indonesia

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