So I heard you are curious about IT and/or auditing. I'm your go-to buddy in this exciting journey. My typical professional life consists of performing (and studying!) IT audit and managing the award-winning magazine, Auditoria. Armed with a Master of Commerce in Digital Transformation from UNSW Sydney, I'm currently wearing multiple hats—ambassador at IIA Indonesia's Young Leader Community, mentor at ISACA Global, Head of Public Relations at MoF-Cybersecurity Community, and trainer at IIA Indonesia. You'll also find me sharing insights on my YouTube channel, speaking at seminars, and crafting content on LinkedIn. Let's connect and dive into the world of IT and auditing together!
"Be patient with yourself. You are growing stronger every day." (Robert Tew)
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| source: pinterest.com/jodiokun |
Some months ago, I finished a 5-week Australia Awards Scholarship Pre-departure Training Program. I belonged to a class consisting of 13 scholars with various backgrounds, meeting for the first time in a virtual classroom. At the end of the program, every student received a final report, and mine is shown below.
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| source: learningforjustice.org |
(Fyuhhh privilege is such a sensitive topic so I tried to write it
carefully. I hope it doesn’t come out in the wrong tone.)
Beberapa waktu yang lalu, Aini Kolbiana yang merupakan salah satu kontributor INJO.ID menghubungi saya terkait rencana memuat cerita mendapatkan CIA, CISA, dan AAS selama masa pandemi. Singkat cerita, wawancara via telepon itu terjadi di sebuah sore dan saya mengatakan bahwa pandemi bukanlah sesuatu yang mudah bagi siapapun (and I felt sorry to anyone because we have to go through such a difficult period) tetapi saya mencoba sebisa mungkin menyikapinya dengan positif. Saya memanfaatkan masa kerja dari rumah (KDR) di mana saya tidak perlu melakukan perjalanan pulang pergi ke kantor itu untuk mengejar mimpi-mimpi yang sekian lama tertunda dengan alasan “tidak punya waktu” (a.k.a. sok sibuk padahal hanya malas. Hihihi.).
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| source: searchenginejournal.com |
Mungkin jarang sekali terucap tetapi saya punya ketertarikan yang besar terhadap isu pemberdayaan perempuan. (Tentu saya bukan ahli untuk berbicara hal ini melainkan hanya seseorang biasa yang memiliki perhatian khusus terhadapnya). Tumbuh di tengah konstruksi sosial yang mengharuskan kaum hawa berusaha lebih banyak ketimbang kaum adam untuk meraih sesuatu, saya sadar perlunya untuk peduli pada isu tersebut. Selain itu, bekerja di dunia yang didominasi laki-laki membuat saya memahami pentingnya menjadi jangkar dalam meningkatkan kepedulian orang-orang terhadap topik ini. Ditambah lagi, organisasi tempat saya bekerja juga secara serius mencurahkan perhatian terhadap pengarusutamaan gender (PUG) sehingga isu ini menjadi semakin dekat dengan saya.
Major alert: Just a random personal story of mine. Feel free to skip it.
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| source: unsplash.com |
(I am aware of the need to
prevent myself from posting a story about good deeds for the doubt of whether I
could keep the pure intention of doing something just because of Allah. Bear
with me. This post isn't about me showing off a deed, but instead, a contemplation
of my recent years' journey).
I finished an i'tikaf
(with strict safety protocols, of course) today and was ready to go back when I saw
the mosque's keeper bringing mop equipment. Seeing the scene in front of me, I
froze. It has been 4 years since the last time I mopped a mosque. Suddenly,
there is a strong urge to ask him whether I could do the chore instead. At
first, he was in doubt probably because he didn't want to trouble me but I said
that I would be happy to do that.
While cleaning up the
floor, I reminisced that in the past, I did not agonize over worldly
life that much.
Back then, I
cared about my worldly life but didn’t let it bother me tremendously. Instead, from time to time, my biggest concern was whether Allah
sees me in a good light. Before doing anything, I'd consider whether Allah
would be happy knowing the choices I've made. I wanted Allah to love me so I
always tried to put Him before anyone/anything. My days partially consisted of
sitting in mosques talking to Allah like He's the best friend I trust the most.
Then and now, indeed I cried a lot but in lieu of worrying about worldly
things, I did because of the realization of the sins I committed yet Allah was
still utterly kind to me. The fact that He showered me with a lot of blessings nevertheless
my flawed self was heartwarming to the point I promise to pay His favors back
by trying to please Him the best I can.
Feeling-wise, I felt
content with each day. I appreciated every little thing, good or bad,
since I trusted Him with my life.
During these current years, I started to care about worldly life more than ever. I am easily upset whenever Allah gives me a huge trial (regardless of the fact that it's just a worldly tribulation, something previously I wasn't too melancholic about). I started to complain that Allah put a heavy burden on my shoulders because my not-so-wise self didn't think I deserve this. I took the marriage issue to a new whole level of grief. I wept countlessly because I can't ignore the pain even though I always tried to convince myself that I am okay. The biggest source of stress is that my parents don't even give me a break. They tried to bring up the particular topic at every opportunity possible. No matter how much effort I put to be a better person, they always think of me as a failed daughter simply because I haven't married yet1. A story about me achieving something but marriage isn't good news anymore. They couldn’t be more careless towards my progress of outgrowing myself as long as I am not telling them a nuptial plan. From my side, it is frustrating to be seen as a failure when I've continuously put so much effort to grow.
As if a woman's
worth is fully dependent on whether she's paired up or not.
But today, while mopping the floor, I remember again that after I die, what's asked isn't my marital status but solely my deeds. Am I pious enough? Do I perform good deeds more than the bad ones? Am I patient and content with Allah's decisions? I doubt the full-of-complaints self of mine today would be able to face Allah in a poised manner. I believe the current me don't dare to answer these questions confidently.
Seeing the reflection on
the floor, I asked where is the old iim who smiled a lot and was thankful for
her life. Also, rather than worrying about worldly life, I should be more
concerned about the hereafter one, right? I should, as before, think
that instead of something to complain about, this is my trial--my battle--my
struggle to prove my belief and trust in Him. I simply want to be so
confident in His decision that I don't anguish over it anymore.
It's 4 A.M., teary, I am
standing with newfound strength in me. Alhamdulillah.
----
1I am deeply sorry to my parents that I am an imperfect daughter,
with such a tragic fate. For being so pitiful, I am truly sorry.
(I am sorry that my posts
these days sound dark. Life isn't all about the rainbows, right? I
just wanted to write my honest feelings that before wasn't my approach to
writing. Don't worry. I'll back to my cheerful self soon insyaAllah.)
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| source: favim.com |
(For Bahasa version, please scroll down. | Versi bahasa Indonesia tersedia di bawah.)
(I must say that the title sounds overly dramatic but bear with me for a while.)
Some days ago, a close friend asked me a question which left me taken aback. There was buried desperation in her voice and eyes as if life has played a wrongful unfair game with her. All the scars on her which were invisible all the time became vividly apparent and now I can’t unsee them.
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| source: kathykeats.com |
Akhir-akhir ini, saya mulai menikmati berbagi kisah di Linkedin. (Believe me, it was not easy for me stepping outside this blog. This platform is my comfort zone and I was afraid to write about my personal story somewhere else). Awal mulanya, hanya karena saya ingin orang-orang yang memiliki cita-cita mendapatkan certified internal auditor (CIA) bisa membaca tips yang saya tuliskan. Itu sedikit yang bisa saya berikan sebagai ungkapan rasa syukur bisa meraih mimpi lama itu. Tidak disangka respon yang saya dapatkan menyulap hari saya berpelangi. Ada banyak orang yang mengirim pesan kepada saya menceritakan mimpi, perjuangan, dan harapan mereka. Juga kenyataan bahwa saya bisa sedikit membantu orang-orang yang tidak saya kenal melalui tulisan sungguh menghangatkan hati. Haru. Trenyuh. Saya pun menyadari, sering kali hal yang tidak dibagi karena saya anggap tidak menarik atau tidak bermanfaat itu dibutuhkan oleh orang lain. (Saya pun berjanji untuk tidak mengabaikan kebaikan kecil yang bisa saya lakukan dalam bentuk menulis sebab barangkali seseorang di luar sana memerlukannya.)
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| image source: australiaawardsindonesia.org |
Halo semuanya! Saya kembali setelah mengambil jeda “nggak ngapa-ngapain” pasca melewati serentetan ujian (termasuk ujian yang akan saya bahas ini) di akhir tahun lalu. Hehe. Di sini saya ingin membagi pengalaman saya mendaftar beasiswa dari Pemerintah Australia itu hingga menjadi salah satu awardees-nya (Alhamdulillah). Saya berharap melalui tulisan ini bisa memberikan insight kepada para pendaftar AAS agar jalannya lebih lancar. Dan inilah takeaways yang saya dapatkan dari proses seleksi itu:
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| source: pinterest.com |
Hello, there! I hope you all are healthy and sane :)
Sudah lama rasanya ingin bercerita soal dunia membaca puisi tetapi saya baru sempat menuliskannya sekarang. Jadi ceritanya beberapa waktu yang lalu saya mengikuti Lomba Baca Puisi dalam rangka Peringatan Hari Oeang Republik Indonesia ke-74. Saat itu, sebenarnya saya sedang tenggelam mengurusi kegiatan Kompetisi Data Analytics Kemenkeu (di mana saya ditunjuk untuk menjadi project manager acaranya). Kompetisi itu menguras hampir seluruh waktu dan tenaga saya sehingga saya awalnya tidak berpikir untuk mengikuti lomba bidang yang telah saya pelajari sejak SMP itu. Tetapi di suatu malam, tiba-tiba saya berpikir: kira-kira saya bakal nyesel nggak ya ini berlalu begitu saja?
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| image source: theodisseyonline.com |
Saya baru saja mengikuti kompetisi menulis opini yang dibuka untuk
seluruh APIP di Indonesia. Artikel berjudul “APIP dan Tata Kelola Data” saya
kirimkan untuk mengikuti kompetisi yang diadakan dalam rangka HUT ke-54 Itjen
Kemenkeu itu. Saya mengerjakan artikel itu dengan cukup ngebut—sekitar
setengah hari saja, itupun di hari terakhir (dasar deadliner!).
Lalu saya memaksakan diri mengirimkannya agar bisa memindahkan perhatian saya
kepada pekerjaan. (You know the constant dissatisfaction of what you write
and think that you might be able to make it better when actually even after
countless times of re-reading, only insignificant minor revisions happened?
Hihi. That’s why for many cases I chose to send them before the greedy self of
mine overtake me).
Mendengar kabar bahwa Mas Febri Diansyah memutuskan mundur dari KPK adalah bukan hal yang baik untuk membuka pagi. Sebuah pesan whatsapp dari mantan Pemred Auditoria menyapa saya, “Febri Diansyah mundur, im” yang sontak membuat saya membeku beberapa detik. Saya tidak akan membicarakan pandangan saya akan mundurnya sosok jubir komisi antirasuah itu sebab sudah banyak yang membahasnya dan secara prinsip, saya setuju dengan opini yang beredar. It’s so heartbreaking that I don’t want to hear or talk about it actually.
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| via muthia-maharani.blogspot.com |
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| via muthia-maharani.blogspot.com |
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| source: instagram.com/thewidodo |
Ramadhan kali ini jelas berbeda. Tidak ada lagi sudut pikiran yang berjingkatan merencanakan kepulangan ke kampung halaman di penghujungnya. Tidak lagi sama persuaan penuh kasih dengan sanak saudara dan handai taulan di tanggal 1 bulan selanjutnya. Bahwa tidak mengunjungi rumah, berdiam di perantauan, dan menahan sesak yang membanjiri dada adalah bentuk cinta setulus-tulusnya saat ini. Itjen Kemenkeu ingin menepuk-nepuk bahu semua orang yang sedang mengarungi masa sulit itu dengan persembahan puisi berjudul “Surat dari Ibu” ini. Kami tahu air mata yang menggantung di sudut mata. Kami memahami kerinduan yang belum dapat terjawab dengan perjumpaan. Kami ikut merasakan masa di mana beban menjadi begitu sarat ditanggung batin.
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| source: skillsdynamix.com |
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| source: emilysquotes.com |
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| source: tenor.com |
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| source: pixabay.com |
